New words and alternatives – by Ray Hudson

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Ray Hudson

You Don’t Say – Vol 36

Ray Hudson
Ray Hudson

I started off this week with one idea and SHAZAM! (That’s what Captain Marvel used to say instead of running into a phone booth to change) Oxford released its list of “so-called new words and that upset my apple cart (new use for the phrase –apple-turnover).

So that’s what I’m on about this week. Incidentally, I think Superman is in trouble – when was the last time you saw a phone booth? Second question, what is a phone booth? It’s rough being a Superhero in these times.

Anyway, here are a few new Oxford accepted words that took my fancy and stimulated even further invention.

Clickbait: an Icon/photo/phrase whose main purpose is to attract attention and encourage visitors to click on a link to a particular web page. Great word! Have you ever been reading an on-line article only to be enticed to click on those outrageous claims and photos that promise interesting pursuits such as the “Mongolian nut juice” that removes your belly fat in four hours, or “see the world’s most outrageous Squirrel attacks?” I fall for it every time and every time I end up in an endless maze of video ads that necessitate a computer reboot to escape from. Also not to be confused with chickbait – which I’ll leave to your imagination.

MacGuyver – to fix anything with the most outrageous materials at hand as did the TV Character of the show of the same name. I remember when he fixed that nuclear meltdown with six rolls of duct tape and a package of bubble gum – sigh – those were the days, living on macguyver reruns and studying the practical applications presented by Red Green, Canada’s official Mr. Duct-tape, residing in Possum Lodge.

Cat café: A café or similar establishment where people pay to interact with cats housed on the premises. I can see it now, shredded natuzzi leather couches and soup de jour avec hairball. It’s the cat’s meow!

Hangry: Another brilliant verbal invention meaning hungry and angry at the same time. But how about a humble suggestion for those of you who have been bullied in those drive-through lineups, hungry and tired, when the clown with the F350 and mud tires butts in on you. Doesn’t that just **** you off? Well, now you can express all that emotion in one more word which embodies road rage: Hangryage. Try it out – yell it out, I’M HANGRYAGE AND I’M NOT GOING OT TAKE IT ANY MORE and…what’s that? Oh yes please, that’s double cream please.

And finally, there’s a new word for people who phone you accidentally from their back pocket (butt-dial) or pocket or purse (pocket dial). These digital delinquents can be amusing and informative however because while they’re unconsciously redialing their last call, the boss (?) girlfriend (?) wife and girlfriend (?) they may be revealing more than an Ashley Madison hack.

So be careful with your new vocabulary, practice it and enjoy it. There will be a test next week.

If you’d like to share any language issues, irritations, comments or gotcha moments, please send them to ray@swmediagroup.ca